2/12/11

 "Wish I was as invisible as you make me feel." -Fall Out Boy
What can I say? It got better for a while.
I hate re-reading the stuff I wrote forever ago. Dramatic or what? Not that anyone's reading it or gives a fuck, so it's okay, but I have a tendency to disgust myself that way.

   Bigger fish to fry today, more stuff to complain about. Writing hurts my hand, and I don't have carpal tunnel from typing yet and this will be the chosen medium.

Six months ago one of my closest friends(Hannah.) moved to Arizona, her parents showing no intention of coming back. But I didn't let us fall out of touch! Oh, no, absolutely not. Texts, calls, Facebook, e-mail, anything. I had always had a little problem with her making OBVIOUS favorites of her other friends, but then she told me that she was moving back! I was the only one she told. And as I'm walking out of school, she sprints up and gives me the biggest hug screaming, "ROXY! ROXY!!"
   I like her. I was understandably excited. She starts to walk away, gesturing "come on!" over her shoulder, and like nothing has changed from the first day I met her, I follow right behind. We start buzzing around to say hi to all of her other close friends of course. She catches up with her old friend, someone who up until 30 seconds ago was saying I was the most important person in her life. (She'll come up a lot. M. Her identity needs to be protected. From the absolute no one that reads this.)
            *Oh, side note? M is a suicidal cutter who I've been trying desperately to take care of since I found out. I've done everything I know how to do and then Hannah shows up and she says, "Everything is so much better now. Isn't it just amazing how Hannah can do that?" Understandably giving me the feeling of, 'Fuck you, bitch.'
  Anyway. After the 10 seconds of excited hello to all of us, she starts frantically searching for someone else. (Randee. She's not that effectual in most of my stories.) "Where's Randee? If I can't find her, I'm gonna cry. I missed her so much!" And after she found her, that's all she cared about. They immediately ran off together, Hannah throwing a heart with her hands over her shoulder and a quick nod to my "call me later, okay?"
   She didn't call me. I get it! She's m o v i n g! She's probably really, really busy.
...right?
   DING DING DING! We have a winner!
Of course not. Instead just a huge "fuck you" over Facebook. Practically 90 pictures of them together over the span of two days. Yeah. I missed you too.

"Invisibility is a super power?
 ...then Superman better watch out."

Sincerely,

I'm Sorry, When I Said I Missed You, I Wasn't Kidding.